WARNING: SPOILERIFFIC!

I just got back from watching the movie.

While I enjoyed Spider-Man 2, and found myself entertained by it, I do have some major issues with the film. Enough of them that turned my Triple ‘A’ summer blockbuster into an entertaining, B average flick.

[1] The Spider-Man/Peter Parker/Mary Jane love triangle –

I realize a big part of the Spider-Man mythology is his elusive, hopeless love for Mary Jane, and his desire to have something that is too dangerous to hold --

-- but I didn’t need nearly two freakin’ hours of soaps.

The Mary Jane/Parker angle so engulfs the movie that its tedious meanderings stretches and drags the pacing across the floor. I was becoming incredibly sick of watching Peter constantly mope over his obsession with Mary Jane.

Not because I hate love stories, and not because I think moping can’t be great for a love story -- but because this wasn’t a love story.

It’s obvious to the audience they love each other, and it’s almost obvious to both Peter and Mary Jane.

IMO, great love stories involve character(s) who try to win the others heart. I didn’t get that from this movie. They already had each other’s heart; it was merely two hours of whining as to why they couldn’t keep it.

My beef is that their “love story” (if you wish to call it that) doesn’t develop enough. While obviously picking up immensely near the end, it’s essentially the same idea retold several times over for the first two hours.

After a while I could only think to myself, “umm… so what else do you got?”.

[2] Okay… okay…. I get it -- his life sucks –

The movie did a great job of visually showing us how much Parker’s life sucks, true.

Dropping his books then getting smacked around.
Aunt May’s mortgage troubles.
His own rent problems.
Getting fired.
Not getting the girl.

However, I didn’t need it re-enforced at every corner. Between the scenes of Peter being crapped on, I wanted to see more definite high points in his life.

Maybe he wins a huge prize that puts a smile on his face for a day. Or maybe something happens that brings some permanent hope to his miserable life.

This was the flow of the movie.

Pizzas late – Fired.
Get to school – Class over and tongue lashing from teacher
Birthday party (a chance for something postitive) – Harry’s contempt with Peter. More Mary Jane/Peter soap. And I also believe this is the scene where he finds out about Aunt May’s foreclosure.
At apartment – Rent problems and constantly hounded by landlord.
In the air – Starts losing powers.
At Diner party – Gets slapped around by Harry. Finds out Mary Jane is getting married and then he has to take pictures of it.
On Train – Great scene of the people carrying his body only to have it end on a low point by Doc Ock winning.
And and and….

Geez!!! While I realize that an important part of Spider-Man is having a crappy life, this movie definitely lacked moments of hope to equal the moments of darkness.

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IMO, the best part of this film happened within the last 40 or so minutes.

Finally we got to see some closure between the dragging subplots of this film.

More moments of hope (like the train scene where they carry his body)
He finally gets Mary Jane
His renewed dedication and powers

However, despite the last 40 minutes or so being great, that does not dismiss the boredom I felt during the earlier stages of the movie.
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[3] Finally….. ”Say Cheese!!!

Because Spider-Man 2 had cheese in spades. And nothing was cheesier than Doc Ock’s hospital scene.

You can tell Rami were having flashbacks to his younger, Hitchcock days with that scene.

It was so over the top cheese that I really couldn’t buy it at all. Namely because the directing and lighting in that particular scene didn’t fit with the rest of the movie.

But it wasn’t just that, I felt many of the scenes had incredibly lame dialogue and bad jokes. Even some (actually, I should say, a lot) of the Mary Jane/Peter scenes had dialogue that made me want to cringe.

And Peter’s “dream sequence” between him and Ben really had me spinning in my chair.

All in all, Spider-Man just had too much cheese for my taste (and I usually like dairy).


I also have some other nitpicks, like I wasn’t too impressed with the scenes of Spider-Man swinging through the city, and some of the Doc Ock fight scenes were too CG based and unbelievable. But overall I do like the movie.

I simply have too many major beefs with the film, like it’s pacing, dialogue, and certain directing decisions that I could justify giving this film any more than a B.

Not a bad film, not a great film (definitely not better than the first IMO), but still a solid flick.

The One, The only One
- The Lotus One