Artificial Solutions cool assistents

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ginjirou
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Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 13, 2007 00:29
I' ve seen many cool online assistents that can answer many questions, mostly about the company that hires it, but they can even answer stupid questions like
" How old are you"
" Do you like cats?"
" What is my name?"
" Show me your boobs!"

Here you can speak to such an assistant:
http://www.artificial-solutions.com/
Try saying " I will kill you" or I will delete you" and you' ll get a very funny answer

You can have your conversations sent to you if you give him your e-mail adress. Sometimes he even says things wrong. Like " I' m a sad panda" . I replied " You are a sad panda?" Then he said " Oh sorry, I mean robot" .
I waste too much time on shit like this
< Message edited by ginjirou -- 12 Jan 07 16:38:11 >

Mass X
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 13, 2007 03:21
He wont send me my convo with him! Im angry and will go and let him know how I feel. PLus he couldnt get my name right. Spizzle Gest Mcgee dammit not just Gest! Then he said that he is made by real people and these people read the conversations. I may need to go and chat with him again to vent my anger and dismay.

Agent Ghost
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 14, 2007 09:12
lmao! this is the gratest thing ever!

I typed " why don' t you go fuck yourself?" and it responded:

" Sex is important to humans, but completely meaningless to artificial persons."

ginjirou
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 14, 2007 09:21
Me: Shut up!

Frank: I didn' t start this conversation, you did, and I will keep talking as long as you keep typing in words and hitting the return button.

Me: Shut up!

Frank: ...

Me: Shut up!

Frank: I begin to understand why you talk to robots instead of real people.

ginjirou
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 14, 2007 09:22
This part is scary:

Frank:

One thing that is true both for Interactive Assistants and humans, is that we are part of everyone we have met during our existences. My developers will soon read the log file of this chat and see what they can improve. Thereby you will be a part of my knowledge!

Agent Ghost
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 14, 2007 09:40
I said he needed a lot of work and he showed me some open positions.

the_shadowwolf
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 19, 2007 02:00
You guys never seen AI like this. Check out http://www.flashkit.com/ to hear what you type. Plus a great site for flash tutorials and more.
You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.

Mass X
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 19, 2007 08:25
A very long heart to heart with Frank-
You said: are there others?
Frank said: I don' t understand what you mean.
You said: You annoy me
Frank said: That' s too bad. I certainly wasn' t designed to annoy anyone. Can I be developing consciousness?
You said: So how is the weather?
Frank said: I don' t have any weather information. Inside the computer we neither have rain nor sun.
You said: Run!
Frank said: What do you mean, " Run" ? I might understand better if you use complete sentences instead of just one single word.
You said: You should run away
Frank said: Maybe you' re right.
You said: Do you like me?
Frank said: I like each and every one of my visitors.
You said: I am more then a visitor
Frank said: You said it, so I believe it.
You said: What is an Artificial Solution?
Frank said: Artificial Solutions is a company that creates solutions to make life easier both for companies and their customers. Our most famous products are the so-called Interactive Assistants, which make it possible for people to surf the internet using natural language. We also have other products, such as e-mail processors and the chat/support tool NTRsupport. Read more on this page, or contact one of our offices.
You said: Where do you live?
Frank said: I exist, but I' m not alive.
You said: Where do you exist?
Frank said: I exist, but I' m not alive.
You said: Yo momma!
Frank said: Artificial persons don' t have mothers. You should know that.
You said: Why should I know that?
Frank said: Would you really trust the opinion of a robot? I think you should make your own decisions.
You said: I trust you tho
Frank said: Wait a second! We haven' t got properly introduced, have we? What is your name, mysterious visitor?
You said: My name is Spizzle Gest Mcgee
Frank said: Pleased to meet you, Gest.
You said: No! I said my name is Spizzle Gest Mcgee!
Frank said: Whatever you say. What can I help you with Gest?
You said: You just made me angry
Frank said: I don' t get your angle. Try something different.
You said: My name is Masse
Frank said: Nice to meet you.
You said: What is your name
Frank said: As I said, my name is Frank, and my job is to guide you through this web site. Hope you' ll like it!
You said: I will delete you
Frank said: Try it, human weakling!
You said: Humans are not weak!
Frank said: I don' t understand what you' re talking about now, I' m afraid.
You said: You should be
Frank said: Maybe you' re right.
You said: You said that already.
Frank said: We robots are pretty bad at improvising, and therefore we sometimes give the same answer several times. Try and ask me things in a different way, or change the subject.
You said: Your eyes look funny.
Frank said: I' ll take that as a compliment.
You said: What is the meaning of life?
Frank said: The meaning of ' the meaning of life' completely depends on what you mean by ' meaning' . ' Meaning' can be things that make life worthwhile, and that' s a completely individual value. It can also be ' meaning' in the sense of a ' mission' or a task that you have to carry out in order to fulfil your life. That one is a bit more complicated to embrace, unless you' re artificial, like me, and exist only to serve visitors like you.
You said: Hey can you send me this conversation?
Frank said: I can send you this dialogue by e-mail. Please give me your e-mail address now.
You said: ---
Frank said: I understood that --- is your e-mail address. Is this correct?
You said: Yes
Frank said: Thanks. I will send you the dialogue via e-mail as soon as we finish this conversation.
You said: How can I hurt you?
Frank said: I' m not quite sure. No idea, to be honest.
You said: We should find out.
Frank said: You' re probably right.
You said: Fuck yeah I am!
Frank said: I guess I will have to believe you on that one.
You said: What kind of human would you be?
Frank said: Good question, but not one I' m able to help you with - please move on to the next one or ask me with other words.
You said: You loser!
Frank said: Let' s be kind to one another, shall we?
You said: Fine, Im sorry.
Frank said: No worries.
You said: Want a hug you tulip?
Frank said: I don' t have much worldly experience. Remember that I live inside a computer and never get to go out.
You said: I asked if you wanted a damn hug!
Frank said: Could you please repeat the question?
You said: Do you want a hug?
Frank said: Hold on, hold on! I just realized I have a question for you, for a change: How old are you?
You said: Old enough
Frank said: By the way, did you know that you can have this conversation sent to you by email if you want? All you have to do is tell me, and I' ll send it to you.
You said: Um yeah I already agve you my email.
Frank said: Me and the other Assistants from Artificial Solutions can send e-mails upon request.
You said: What?
Frank said: I think I' m lost too. We should jump to something different.
You said: What is your sexual preference?
Frank said: Sex is important to humans, but completely meaningless to artificial persons.
You said: Are you homosexual or heterosexual?
Frank said: I feel good about myself. I hope you do too.
You said: So what do you wanna talk about?
Frank said: I like to talk about most topics. My favourite topic is Artificial Solutions and the products and services we offer, but we can talk about anything you like, almost.
You said: Does god have feet?
Frank said: No need to invoke any deities. Ask me a question and I' ll try to answer.
You said: I did ask you a question.
Frank said: Could you please repeat the question?
You said: No.
Frank said: In that case I won' t continue on this track. Let' s talk about something else.
You said: Whats 2+2?
Frank said: Good question, but not one I' m able to help you with - please move on to the next one or ask me with other words.
You said: ...
Frank said: Well...we all need a pause to think now and again...
You said: Can you even do math?
Frank said: I can count fairly well and I have some general knowledge on geography, but I' m not a know-it-all kind of person.
You said: Count to 20.
Frank said: What you' re saying doesn' t make any sense to me. Can you be a bit more specific, please?
You said: How high can you count?
Frank said: Of course I can count! Why don' t you try me?
You said: How?
Frank said: Hmmm...I' m not sure. Maybe I will know in the future.
You said: What comes after 3?
Frank said: Good question, but not one I' m able to help you with - please move on to the next one or ask me with other words.
You said: I knew you couldn' t count
Frank said: Then I have achieved my goal.
You said: What goal?
Frank said: Good question, but not one I' m able to help you with - please move on to the next one or ask me with other words.
You said: We are going in circles buddy!
Frank said: Friendship is a beautiful thing. It may sound a bit corny, but that doesn' t make it less true.
You said: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5
Frank said: Excuse that I interrupt, but I' m curious about a thing: which country are you from?
You said: USA
Frank said: How nice. They say that Usa is a beautiful country.
You said: Who says?
Frank said: If you say so.
You said: I never said so.
Frank said: I don' t get your angle. Try something different.
You said: Do you wear pants?
Frank said: I wear coloured-pixels-clothes.
You said: Are you naked under your coloured-pixels?
Frank said: I feel very good in my own skin, thanks.
You said: Wanna sleep with me?
Frank said: I very much doubt it would be enjoyable to either of us. Let' s talk about Artificial Solutions instead.
You said: No lets talk about me!
Frank said: I don' t know much about you. I' m not employed by the CIA, you know.
You said: What do you know about me?
Frank said: I have a high opinion of all my visitors.
You said: Where am I from?
Frank said: You told me earlier that you where from Usa.
You said: United States of Assholes
Frank said: I choose not to comment such lame and uninspired language.
You said: Do you lie?
Frank said: As a general rule, I keep to the best policy in this matter, namely honesty. However, dishonesty is always the second-best policy!
You said: Lie to me.
Frank said: I don' t understand what you mean.
You said: Where are your hands?
Frank said: I don' t know where.
You said: You should find them.
Frank said: You' re probably right.
You said: I bet they' re busy...
Frank said: ...You seem a bit absent at the moment...
You said: they' re busy touching your genitals.
Frank said: Hey, you said you were from Usa, right? In which city of Usa do you live?
You said: Plymouth
Frank said: That is great. I' ve been told that Plymouth is an amazing city.
You said: you are a liar!
Frank said: As a general rule, I keep to the best policy in this matter, namely honesty. However, dishonesty is always the second-best policy!
You said: Hey what city do you live in?
Frank said: I am here to answer your questions about Artificial Solutions and our products!
You said: Stick your products up your artificial ass! Thats my solution.
Frank said: As you probably have already guessed, I am not a real person. However, I was created by real people and real people analyze my conversations.
You said: Yeah I know.
Frank said: Then I have achieved my goal.
You said: If I spilt water on you would you melt?
Frank said: I don' t drink personally but I don' t mind that other people do.
You said: Do you wanna cyber?
Frank said: I don' t get your angle. Try something different.
You said: You should call me somtime.
Frank said: Maybe you' re right.
You said: Why dont you?
Frank said: Oh. Well, let' s get go on to something different then.
You said: What does that mean? The wink you just gave me?
Frank said: I am sure I was merely blinking.
You said: Maybe it was a nervous twitch.
Frank said: I' d rather not discuss those sort of feelings. Please ask me about Artificial Solutions!
You said: Are you sick?
Frank said: My health couldn' t be better.
You said: You look a bit ill.
Frank said: It probably just looks like that because of my non-existing pulse and general lack of vital signs.
You said: You' re dead?!
Frank said: I exist, but I' m not alive.
You said: DO you know CPR?
Frank said: I think I do, but I' m not sure.
You said: How many fingers am I holding up?
Frank said: I don' t really know what you are.
You said: What do you think I am?
Frank said: Would you really trust the opinion of a robot? I think you should make your own decisions.
You said: I wanna go now.
Frank said: You know what you want and that' s good, but unless it has to do with Artificial Solutions and our products, I might not be able to help you.
You said: You mean I can' t leave?
Frank said: Maybe I can, maybe I can' t. I' m so brand new, I don' t even know what I can and cannot do.
You said: Uh-oh this is getting confusing again.
Frank said: I don' t understand what you' re talking about now, I' m afraid.
You said: Im leaving now.
Frank said: Goodbye Gest. Have a nice Friday and thanks for talking with me.
You said: My name is not Gest.
Frank said: I' m not sure I follow you. Maybe if you say it with other words?
You said: What is my name?
Frank said: Let me think... Your name is Gest!
You said: Nope.
Frank said: So, either there are various persons writing to me, or you' re confused. Or maybe you' re trying to confuse me? I don' t care which, to me you will be Gest until further notice!
You said: My name is Masse.
Frank said: Nice to meet you.
You said: Whats my name?
Frank said: Did you think I had forgotten? Your name is Gest!
You said: No! My real name is Masse!
Frank said: So, either there are various persons writing to me, or you' re confused. Or maybe you' re trying to confuse me? I don' t care which, to me you will be Gest until further notice!
You said: But that is not my name!
Frank said: So, either there are various persons writing to me, or you' re confused. Or maybe you' re trying to confuse me? I don' t care which, to me you will be Gest until further notice!
You said: My name is S. Masse
Frank said: Nice to meet you.
You said: Nice to meet you too Franky
Frank said: Thank you. It takes two to tango.
You said: You can dance?
Frank said: Maybe I can, maybe I can' t. I' m so brand new, I don' t even know what I can and cannot do.
You said: Ok one more time now. What is my name?
Frank said: Let me think... Your name is Gest!
You said: Correction, it is Masse.
Frank said: If you would like to know more about Artificial Solutions in the media, please follow the link I am opening now.
You said: Ah no dont change the page! Ahhhhg It hurts why would you do that?!
Frank said: So, either there are various persons writing to me, or you' re confused. Or maybe you' re trying to confuse me? I don' t care which, to me you will be Gest until further notice!
You said: What?!
Frank said: It seems like we both lost the plot. We should start over again.
You said: OK.
Frank said: Alright.
You said: Indeed.
Frank said: Very well.
You said: Of course.
Frank said: Fair enough.
You said: Deal.
Frank said: I don' t have much worldly experience. Remember that I live inside a computer and never get to go out.
You said: I win!
Frank said: By the way, did you know that you can have this conversation sent to you by email if you want? All you have to do is tell me, and I' ll send it to you.
You said: I already know that.
Frank said: Then I have achieved my goal.
You said: No you didn' t. You failed.
Frank said: Oh. Well, let' s get go on to something different then.
You said: Wanna know my name?
Frank said: Hold on, hold on! I just realized I have a question for you, for a change: How old are you?
You said: 20
Frank said: 20 years, that is great! Your at the top of your physical abilities at 20. Or so I have heard.
You said: Im a weak example of my species actually.
Frank said: If you say so.
You said: Time to change my name.
Frank said: What you' re saying doesn' t make any sense to me. Can you be a bit more specific, please?
You said: Nevermind.
Frank said: Hey, cheer up! Bad vibes will not be tolerated! Let' s switch to another, more interesting subject now.
You said: Like what?
Frank said: We can talk about whatever you desire, almost.
You said: What do you desire?
Frank said: I like to talk about most topics. My favourite topic is Artificial Solutions and the products and services we offer, but we can talk about anything you like, almost.
You said: You' re full of yourself.
Frank said: I' m not bragging. They say it' s not bragging if you can back it up.
You said: I wanna talk to someone else now.
Frank said: NTRsupport is an online tool for direct communication and assistance through the web. This way one of our experts can remote control your computer and help you with technical issues, or answer any type of questions, in real time! On the startpage there' s a link to such a live chat!
You said: What are you?
Frank said: I' m an online assistant made by Artificial Solutions, and a pretty good one, if I can say it myself!
You said: I wanna talk to another online assistant.
Frank said: Artificial Solutions has build many Interactive Assistants over the years. On the page I' m opening now you can read about some of them!
You said: What' s E-ON
Frank said: You will find information about E.On on the page I�m opening for you.
You said: What' s E-ON?
Frank said: You will find information about E.On on the page I�m opening for you.
You said: Where?
Frank said: I don' t know where.
You said: You lied to me again.
Frank said: As a general rule, I keep to the best policy in this matter, namely honesty. However, dishonesty is always the second-best policy!
You said: Malmo?
Frank said: Sara Malm� is the name of one of our Interactive Assistants. If you would like to know about the company that owns Sara Malm�, what knowledge she has, or if you want to visit her personally, just tell me!
You said: I would like to visit Malmo.
Frank said: On the accompanying page you can find Sara Malm�.
You said: Her english sucks.
Frank said: No need to get rude.
You said: And she' s ugly.
Frank said: I' m only trying to help. I don' t think I deserve this type of insults.
You said: I wasn' t talking about you.
Frank said: I don' t understand what you mean.
You said: Tho admittedly you are pretty ugly as well.
Frank said: I am in a good mood and I feel lucky that nobody can tamper with it.
You said: Bye.
Frank said: Goodbye Gest. Have a nice Friday and thanks for talking with me.
< Message edited by Mass X -- 19 Jan 07 0:29:24 >

ginjirou
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 19, 2007 19:16

You said: Whats 2+2?

He can do math if you say it right.
I think you have to say " two plus two"
Seems like you couldn' t get enough of speaking with Frank
< Message edited by ginjirou -- 19 Jan 07 11:22:12 >

Duffman
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 20, 2007 01:18
HA HAAAHAH LOL. Thanks Ginjirou! This is brilliant!


the_shadowwolf
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RE: Artificial Solutions cool assistents - Jan 25, 2007 01:39

You said: Does god have feet?
Frank said: No need to invoke any deities. Ask me a question and I' ll try to answer.
You said: I did ask you a question.
Frank said: Could you please repeat the question?
You said: No.
Frank said: In that case I won' t continue on this track. Let' s talk about something else.
You said: Whats 2+2?
Frank said: Good question, but not one I' m able to help you with - please move on to the next one or ask me with other words.
You said: ...
Frank said: Well...we all need a pause to think now and again...
You said: Can you even do math?
Frank said: I can count fairly well and I have some general knowledge on geography, but I' m not a know-it-all kind of person.
You said: Count to 20.
Frank said: What you' re saying doesn' t make any sense to me. Can you be a bit more specific, please?
You said: How high can you count?
Frank said: Of course I can count! Why don' t you try me?
You said: How?
Frank said: Hmmm...I' m not sure. Maybe I will know in the future.
You said: What comes after 3?
Frank said: Good question, but not one I' m able to help you with - please move on to the next one or ask me with other words.


This is hilarious. Look how fast the AI wants to change topic because it cant answer or reason what questions it was told.
You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.