Xbox Bashing

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Bishonen
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Xbox Bashing - Jan 01, 2006 14:47
...inevitable, it was.....

... boring day, got up late and decided to play some phat-@$$ed tunes on my ageing black xbox to accompany my work-out (got to look good for the 2006 pu$$y you know)

...... decided to load up the original Project Gothem because i just LOVE the two awesome break-beat tunes that the options menu starts up with ......

... so I' m working out.... crunches and push ups and sh*t, when i remember that the in-game licenses are pretty bad@$$ too..... .....so i select ' quick race' and choose a random track, as i have already configured the in-game cd playlist...

... the level loads and the cars are revving ...but there' s no sound....

" huh? ... what the f*ck is this sh*t??"

(i REALLY hate having to stop mid count during a work-out) .... so i go back, pause the game and look at the in-car stereo controls.... volume is on max, track name is flashing .... but no sound...

...decide to switch between in-car sound settings (cd, radio etc) to see is this will help, when the game decides to freeze.....

...." punk-@$$ mo fo" and more swear words as i turn off the ' box and re-boot (getting annoyed because my body is beginning to warm down)

...half a year later, the quick race is loading again..... ...camera is flashing around Westminster and the cars are revving again but....

...can you guess?....

NO F*CKING SOUND!!!!!

...." ok, just take deep breaths" .... ...the game crashes again and i decide to just go back to playing the option menu tunes for my work-out as I' ve almost totally warmed down now....

...re-boot.... ...waiting... waiting...

...menu loaded .... .....slam-dancing on my own to phat@$$ed bass pumping out my tv... everything cool again.... return to my dumbbell curls....

...but....

...the ungrateful piece of regurgitated pc turds decides to GO INTO DEMO MODE!!


" MOTHERF*CKING C*** !!!!!!"



BASH!!!!



...before i know it, I' ve run over and monster-bashed it..... right on the green logo.... ...once but very, very hard....

.....later, i turn it on just to see what happens..... after about five minutes of the xbox logo on screen and a rather loud:

" wrrrrich-churrr.... wrrrrich-churrr....wrrrrich-churrr.....wrrrrich-churrr.....wrrrrich-churrr"

....it stops and i get this on screen:



....and then i notice that my xbox is doing this:

Hey...
..I' m...
...broke




....so have i killed it? ....or is that just a glitch which can be solved with a screwdriver or something??... ...there' s no way that I' m spending anymore cash on it...

< Message edited by Bishonen -- 1 Jan 06 23:29:02 >
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Abasoufiane
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 01, 2006 16:45
think you need some counceling

Joe Redifer
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 01, 2006 16:48
Instead of Gotham, I suggest putting in a good game instead. It should work. When you bashed the Xbox, you undoubtedly scratched the shit out of the Gotham CD. No big loss since it is Project Gotham. Look at the Gotham DVD and you' ll likely see thick circular scratches. Throw it in the trash where it belongs, scratched or not.

locopuyo
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 01, 2006 19:56
whie you' re getting counceling see if they can fix your ... problem too.
"If you knew how good I am you would think I'm modest."

yoshimitsu15
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 01, 2006 23:56
I' d say after you' ve taken anger management classes and learned to write in paragraphs...that' d be a good time to send it in to be fixed.
In response to the following complaint I have decided to change my signature:

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Vx Chemical
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 00:02
I think you broke the harddrive of you blackbox. So unless you purchased it lately, i think your only option, is to get it modified, and install a new harddrive with a preloaded system on, it could even be the original xbox one!

yoshimitsu15
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 00:16
Oh and btw...you still use your Xbox...that was soooo 2005.
In response to the following complaint I have decided to change my signature:

" by the way, yoshimitsu you might want to click the little checkbox that makes your signature disappear." -Jonah Shoemaker, Residential Dumbass

Vx Chemical
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 01:27

Oh and btw...you still use your Xbox...that was soooo 2005.



LOL

UnluckyOne
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 01:29

ORIGINAL: yoshimitsu15

I' d say after you' ve taken anger management classes and learned to write in paragraphs...that' d be a good time to send it in to be fixed.


Agreed. Life skills are useful things to have.

]GaNgStA[
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 03:21
Man get yourself an iPod or a god damn Stereo :)

Marink
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 03:52
Come on guys, you' ve gotten overly frustrated by a game once(the only ones I haven' t been pissed off by are probably the Eye Toy/dance games and Paper Mario:TTYD)!

I suggest playing something like GTA or Resi 4(assuming you have any of those on different consoles) and just releasing all your stress on anyone you happen to see.
< Message edited by Marink -- 2 Jan 06 11:52:53 >

Bishonen
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 08:33
...ohhh i get it.... ...

...a lot of you FB' s are pissed because you don' t like seeing the greatest ever gaming machine getting bitch-slapped...

..I' m really sorry, i promise to be more careful next time!

.... Seriously, if you think I' m bad, that' s nothing compared to someone i know.......he has dents in his wall from where he' s smashed controllers into it....


yoshimitsu15..you still use your Xbox...that was soooo 2005

..wha?? ..unless I' m mistaken, yesterday was 1/1/2006....


Joe Look at the Gotham DVD and you' ll likely see thick circular scratches.

..yeah it was scratched.... but only lightly.... ...it seems to work fine in my other xbox...

..it still works!
..plan B


...I' m just annoyed because the one i bashed was my DOA Xbox..... for some reason those mo-fos at Team Ninja are unable to make games which you can save onto memory card.... so unless i cough up loads of cash, all my saves are gone (at least my Ninja Gaiden Black saves are on my Crystal Xbox)...


Marink I suggest playing something like GTA or Resi 4

... funny you should say that.... I' m expecting a shiny new cut-price slimline PS2 any day now, packed with the special edition of Resident Evil 4!!

...you also bet your @$$ that it won' t get bashed
< Message edited by Bishonen -- 2 Jan 06 16:44:14 >
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Terry Bogard
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 10:35
Worst bashing I ever gave something was kind of accidental! I put some big cracks on one of my Neo-Geo joystick controllers - the cheap hollow $hitte that came with the console.. Those things were awful! I was sitting on the ground playing some games, it was a pain trying to duck with those controllers. I died a couple times because I held down on the stick for my character to duck, which it did for a brief moment and then it stood up and moved forward and got hit in the process. After going through this a few times I repeatedly stomped the heel of my foot on the ground and the last two hits swung over to 2nd Neo joystick controller and smashed it good. Still worked afterwards but was a bit glitchy. Games would automatically pause when using it, hehe.
Terry Bogard - currently the most Unhelpful member of the Kikizo forums.

Marink
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 12:33

I' m expecting a shiny new cut-price slimline PS2 any day now, packed with the special edition of Resident Evil 4!!


I was lucky enough to recieve the PS2 version for christmas. Crisp graphics, fantastic sound(especially what Capcom did with the wind effects), relentless action and possibly the best gameplay I' ve ever experienced in any action game! Of course, you' ve obviously heard all of this before. By the way, what am I doing away from it????????? Well... have fun.

Vx Chemical
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 12:48
Unless you already have it, get if for the cube which is even crisper, better controlled, though you dont have the Ada missions, which is kinda sad.

Chee Saw
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 13:34


ORIGINAL: ]GaNgStA[

Man get yourself an iPod or a god damn Stereo :)


Here, here.

locopuyo
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 15:54
It is hard to think of any ps2 game as " crisp" when there are high def 360 games.
"If you knew how good I am you would think I'm modest."

Vx Chemical
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 02, 2006 23:49
Right, God i would love to Play RE4 in HD, but i guess thats why im looking forward to RE5, just wish i had a HD tv.

And now im going to get insanely pour going houseshopping with my GF!

Marink
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 05:34
Well, for me graphics are just a ' bonus' . I mostly concentrate on the music and gameplay. Sure, I enjoy the cut-scenes most of all- but I wouldn' t mind how ' bad' the graphics are, I wouldn' t love the game any less(I could manage a one shouldered Cloud in FFVII).

Vx Chemical
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 07:20
To me music is a bonus, graphics are important, holds much better immersion for me. I dont really want cutscenes unless they are ingame, or made by Blizzard. Well ofcourse some are neat.

Marink
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 11:23
Man, I LOVE videogame music! Especially things like Doopliss' song and any particularly evil music. Don' t get me wrong, I' m not saying I have anything against games with detailed graphics- I still enjoy great graphics. It' s just that, ' bad' graphics don' t put me off games.

Vx Chemical
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 13:04
Im not totally a graphics hore, but truly ugly games i cant get myself to play them, but its rare that those games hold in qualities at all.

Bishonen
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 15:07

Chee Saw
quote:

ORIGINAL: ]GaNgStA[

Man get yourself an iPod or a god damn Stereo :)


Here, here


....dudes, when you wanna listen to truly awesome music you have to FEEL IT.... ...the bass has got to make your WHOLE FRICIN' HOUSE move... ...ipods are for discreet music like Mozart or something...

....and don' t you get off on video game soundtracks? ... got to be deaf if you didn' t notice how good that original Project Gothem menu music is, or half the tunes in Ninja Gaiden for example...


Marink I was lucky enough to recieve the PS2 version for christmas. Crisp graphics, fantastic sound(especially what Capcom did with the wind effects), relentless action and possibly the best gameplay I' ve ever experienced in any action game! Of course, you' ve obviously heard all of this before. By the way, what am I doing away from it????????? Well... have fun.


...can words describe what a genuinely fantastic game Resident Evil 4 is?..... i have never felt as immersed in a game.... which is due to the decision to place the camera behind Leon..... this has to be the finest recent innovation in an action game... ...it also allows the player to maintain a strong connection with the lead character, unlike the over-saturated FPS genre, where you almost instantly forget who you' re supposed to be playing as once the cut scenes end....
...Fantastic environments, Great story (stick Deathmatch up your @$$), Atmosphere, Exploding heads, Intelligent AI (not as good as Halo2 of course), Getting decapitated, Mini games, Satisfyingly meaty real world ordinance, .. *swoon* .....i' m gonna wet myself!


Vx Chemicalget if for the cube which is even crisper, better controlled, though you dont have the Ada missions, which is kinda sad


...originally i was.... but then i heard about the EXTRA 20+ HOURS in Ada' s ' Separate Ways' side mission, which includes a whole new Cruise Liner ship level (how long is 360' s Condemned again?) and new weapons like the Star-Trek style disintegrater laser....

...there was only one sane choice (plus MG3: Substance, DMC3: Special Edition (20 bucks!), Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams etc.)



....but we digress.... ....no more off topic..... more console-meets-brutal-death type stories please....
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Joe Redifer
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 18:05
Videogame music kicks ass. I demand that everyone like videogame music as much as I do. I absolutely HATE it when games license bands or whatever for the music (any EA game, etc). Original game music is what kicks ass.

Terry Bogard
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 03, 2006 18:45

Videogame music kicks ass. I demand that everyone like videogame music as much as I do. I absolutely HATE it when games license bands or whatever for the music (any EA game, etc). Original game music is what kicks ass.


Separated at birth I tell ya, LOL..
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KiLLeR
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 04, 2006 16:12
Bishonen, the behind-the-character camera is not new. Ubisoft also has it on Cold Fear, which by the way if you haven' t played already, you have to. Those graphics are just soooooooooooooo niceee, and the sounds, omg, when u shoot that pistol and u blow ppls heads off....sooo satisfying.

I Love game musics, and yes Bishonen, Ninja Gaiden has some sick music, and have I mentioned I LOVE Halo music???? especially the main theme, but the version with the electric guitar from Halo2. ONe of the things that make me love a game, is the music, which is why i really like Halo and Ninja Gaiden. Do you guys remember Ninja Gaiden 2 for the NES? The cutscenes music was always soooooo sick, especially at the beginning of the game, which is y I loved the game soo much, apart from it being so goddamn challenging. I have to say that the NFS games have sick soundtracks, even tho they are songs by other artists and stuff, but they go so well with the gameplay. GTA III got my attention cuz of the in-car radio, god those songs were sooo sick, it just added something to the game that made me wanna play it even more.

About the bashing thing, well let' s say back in the day when I used to play Ninja Gaiden 2, one day I got really f*cking pissed (my gamepad was being gay too) and my heel had a meeting with the console . End result? I had to go out and buy another one cuz apparently my foot was really mad and smashed the sh*t out of that piece of junk... lol, it felt good too I must say. That' s the most I' ve taken my anger towards game consoles. My usual reactions when I' m pissed are punching the Xbox, or if im comfortably sitting on my couch and don' t feel like getting up but I' m still mad, i smash the controller against the coffee table, and I' m surprised it' s still working fine. I have the green edition Xbox. My mouse on the other hand, when I play Counter-Strike....I just bought a new mouse a week ago cuz the other one was in really bad shape. btw, anyone play CS here? Wanna play sometime?

Bishonen
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RE: Xbox Bashing - Jan 05, 2006 13:26
..... i remember hearing about Cold Fear, but it really didn' t get much coverage... i assumed it wasn' t nearly as good as Resi 4, which Capcom had been working on for almost 5 years.... so they must of come up with that camera angle first?.... I' ll have to find out more about Cold Fear... (or a sequel maybe?)....

.... i think that NG and Halo MUST have the best overall ingame soundtrack of recent times..... ...Halo' s classical scores are fantastic, waaay better than 2' s IMO..

....Wipeout is known for having good music also.... ...has the new one got a decent custom soundtrack? ... remember thinking when i used to play Wipeout2 that the game would benefit from high quality ingame music over the licenses, which didn' t really go with the game (what has starting a fire got to do with futuristic racing?) .....mind you, that game could have done with a proper attempt at a story also....

.....and breaking stuff (" Damm right I' m a maniac" ) is defiantly therapy.... ...i once smashed the s*it out of my guitar, just for the fun of it....

....hey that reminds me, remember how ID got Trent Reznor (NIN) to create the score for Quake? ...they should do that on all big budget high concept games.... ...real musicians are always going to come up with something good.....
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